Dear Editor,
I have recently discovered that the column “Fun Things to Do in Auxientia” was curtailed to make room for a new column in its place, entitled “Laughs.”
I am a faithful reader of the Observer, and I like to think I am not so critical as to poopoo a new idea without giving it a chance. But I must say, this poopoo must be flushed out forthwith.
The beloved old section featured tourist destinations and neighborhood festivals. It featured coming events and interesting historical demonstrations. This new section on laughs presents freakish caricatures of our leaders and picture stories that look like ancient Bāhira icon drawings.
I, sir, am not a picture book reader. I am a newspaperman. I purchase my paper believing in its integrity and in the power of the written word. I believe it was the first editor of the Observer, Kingit Barteus, that said, “Let this journal stand as a sword of light to banish the darkness of ignorance and spread the radiance of truth throughout the land.”
I can only imagine the shame you must feel when you think upon what the paper has become, full of advertisements and “funnies” and sensationalist stories about what The Gilded has got up to. As one born into The Gilded society, I wish for you to know that your caricatures are poppycock. They are poopoo, sirs, and you ought to feel ashamed of them.
I should conclude by saying that I do not wish to offend, and only mean to alert you to these concerns.
However: I am afraid my blood is near to boiling, and that all offense is meant sincerely!
Yours,
P. M. Snodgrass, Bindery Street
